Romance and Mystery Novels

by Alina Adams

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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

BEST. SKATING. MOVIE. EVER.

I laughed, I cried, it was (without a doubt) better than Cats.

Yes, I'm talking about Blades of Glory. The best skating movie ever. (And no, I don't think I was unduly influenced by the fact that I was out of the house. In the evening. For the first time in months without at least one child, usually three, attached to me through various hand-holding, strollers, and straps).

What made Blades of Glory so great? The fact that it wasn't pretending to be "accurate."

Cutting Edge pretended to be accurate. While breaking the laws of physics with their "Parchenko" move. And featuring Olympic competition under spotlights. And doing away with Regionals and Sectionals.

Ice Princess pretended to be accurate. While suggesting that understanding the physics behind a move was all you needed to be able to master it. Perhaps if Christopher Reeve had understood the physics behind walking, he'd have been able to get out of bed and do a little jig, the slacker.

Cutting Edge 2 pretended to be accurate. And then... Well, there's a whole list, here. Plus, their "Parchenko" equivalent is, ironically, even less physically possible than the Iron Lotus performed in Blades of Glory!

Ice Castles pretended to be accurate. The girl was blind! Doing figures!!

And then there were the Blades of Glory moments that rang ever so true to life. The birthday gift of ten bottles of protein powder. The non-skating sibling overshadowed by the star(s). The defeated skater lamenting, "Damn, now I'm going to have to get a real job. I don't know how to do anything." The backstage bacchanalia of a touring ice show.

Also, all of the pair movies listed above (plus the lesser-known Champions: A Love Story) featured a boy who'd never figure skated before, whipping himself into competitive shape in record time. At least in Blades of Glory, the two men were co-World Champions. Somehow, that makes their ultimate partnership more authentic. ;)
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