THE JILLIAN THEY ARE...

The harder they fall...

So. Sir John, you want to remind your fellow judges that a fall is not adequate reason to lose a competition, huh?

It was enough to bounce poor Todd Bridges...

Oh, and Lloyd? Really, really should learn to do math in your head, dude.

And now, my actor suggestions for the inevitable Skating With Celebrities 2:

Although FOX promoted this as Disaster on Ice, the fact is, there were no major crashes and the celebrities, for the most part, acquitted themselves quite nicely (Dave Coulier, I am not talking to you).

So, for the next round, why don't we ditch the falling-on-their-heads aspect and get some celebrities who have a bit of skating experience, to really knock it up a notch.

For your consideration, I offer:

Kristian Alfonso (Hope; Days of Our Lives): For years, her bio has boasted that she won a gold medal in figure skating at the Junior Olympics. Now is her chance to demonstrate how she did it -- not to mention explain what the heck that event is.

Julie Benz: Before she was the homicidal Darla on Buffy/Angel, she was a National Competitor in Ice Dance (1988).

Sarah Michelle Geller: Another one with a dubious title on her resume: "New York State Champion." Show me the Axels, Buffy! (Maybe Kristy Swanson can come back and we could do a Buffy vs. Buffy! And then Julie Benz could devour them both.)

Rebecca Herbst (Elizabeth; General Hospital): When I interviewed her a few years back she said she used to go to Lake Arrowhead for their skating camp to take lessons from Frank Carroll. She said she was working on her triples. Let's see them!

Patrick Swayze: He claims to have been a competitive skater as well as dancer up through high-school, and did roller-skate boogie in an early movie. I'm ready for Dirty Dancing on Ice, how about you all?

Any others?